Spam-Gar! Part 1, It Begins

Lots of spam comments lately. Most of them are repetitive comments saying some slight variation of ‘hey good post, very thoughtful. OH BY THE WAY I FOUND A PLACE TO WATCH TRANSFORMERS 2 ONLINE CLIK HERE KAY THANKS!”

Seriously. What idiot thinks this is good marketing for anything?

With this being mainly (so far) a transformers blog I am apparently attracting all the dumb ass ones about watching the movie online at what’s probably a scam site.

It makes me kind of miss the more interesting spam, where at least there was some variety.

That gets me thinking… If the Junkions in G1 learned to speak from old earth tv signals, what if a modern show had them intercepting internet spam?

“I am Wreck-Gar! I am Nigerian royalty! Horny college girls want cheap Canadian meds! Finally you too can pleasure a woman with a genuine replica rolex!

animal sex.

Animal Sex!

ANIMAL SEX!”

(That link is safe, by the way. It’s just to an earlier blog entry.)

~Matt Booker

13 thoughts on “Spam-Gar! Part 1, It Begins

  1. I genuinely exploded with laughter. I think you have the foundations for the most fantastic of Wreck-Gar interpretations this side of the known Universe.

  2. … yeah SPAM … well so far you’re keeping your comments pretty clean :)
    Isn’t there an option to use captchas ? That would get rid of most of the SPAM.

    Other that that: YAY Spam-Gar =D

  3. That’s a grand compliment, Esoteric, and I’ll take it as such. :D

    Schlecki, yeah I could go with that but then I don’t get to see the sometimes hilarious ones. It hasn’t bothered me till this recent swath of boring ones.

    Spam-Gar is fun to write, so expect him to pop by every now and then.

    I am curious, though… Which version of Wreck-Gar do each of you hear when you read that?

    (It varies, but I’d say animated’s overeager innocence is the more rotfl.)

    ~Matt Booker

  4. When I saw the title, I was hoping you’d finally do the Wreck-Guide. YOU HAVE LET ME DOWN, MATT!

    Esoteric: Nothing beats G1 Wreck-Gar!

    NOTHING.

    Nothing.

    Nothing…

    Matt: At first I heard Ani Wreck-Gar, because of the “I am Wreck-Gar!”, but then it switched to G1.

  5. Tough call, really. The attitude seems so Animated… but Eric Idle would be right at home saying that stuff.

    I think I’m going to have to go with Ani, just for the lack of flange to get in the way of the zaniness, and the over-the-top wide-eyed nature of said zaniness.

  6. Monty, I KNEW you were going to think that. I’m still working on designing the wreck-gar thing, but it’s not top on my list so it’s a ‘as I think of it’ thing.

    Luke, that’s about what happened when I was thinking of it. It’s easy to slip into Eric Idle, but again, animated’s over eager innocence is much more rotfl when talking about penis enlargement.
    ~Matt Booker

  7. I dunno, I watched Monty Python at the Hollywood Bowl a few weeks back. I could totally see Wreck-Gar wondering around yelling “Albatross!” voiced by John Cleese while waving one about.

    Yep, I’m bent.

  8. Matt: Wreck-Gar should always be on top of your list!

    I did not know that when I link one of your posts on Twitter, it says it in the comics. Whatever made that comic used the wrong verb though.

  9. G1 wrecker is a little old school, dude. But weird al ROCKS. Monty why is your picture weird als wreckgar? =p

  10. Because there aren’t any good pictures of G1 Wreck-Gar’s face, except one from before he and the Junkions turned good.

    Annnnnd, because I’m currently growing a mustache and goatee like Ani Wreck-Gar…

  11. I lol’d.

    I found a cool website where you can stream or download TRANSFORMERS REVENGE OF THE FALLEN for FREE!!! Check out this amazing website!! totallylegit-soundingwebsitenameBOOBSBOOBSBOOBS.com

  12. Ah, the only facial hair that looks decent on me is a bit of scruff. Like a beard got a buzz cut. Definitely take pictures if it’s successful, though!

    Bitter Cold, lol at the boobsboobsboobs, as that’s pretty accurate.

    ~Matt Booker

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