Marriage Post

I got married last weekend. We didn’t pick the date because of Valentines day, though we’ll probably get that comment for the rest of our lives, but picked the day because of two things.

First, my wife’s brother is in the military and we had to work a bit around his schedule, and second, it was already our anniversary. So we had to learn a new month, but the day was still the same. :D

Thankfully, I don’t think any of our impressionable relatives read the blog, so I don’t have to go through a big list of the thank yous from all the people who helped us plan, pay for, and set up the wedding (still though, many thanks to my mother in law and father in law, aunts and uncles in laws, and grandparents in laws for all the great help they gave us!)

I have to say, this was the best wedding I’ve been to in a while, and not just because I was the groom. I thought I’d share some details with you, dear readers. :)

We were married by Melody’s great aunt Cathy, who was more than just helpful and very easy to get along with. She even laughed when, during premarital counseling, we put down… interesting answers.

One such question was, “Choose up to three words from the following list that line up with what groups of people you are passionate about.”

There were such words as “Abused” and “Musicians” and “All People.”

I chose only one, and it was one that I wrote in myself.

I wrote it in bold, and underlined it vividly.

It said, “Vikings.”

When the second part of that question asked to “Focus and narrow your selection down to one and make it more specific,” I answered…

Awesome Vikings
(that are manly.)

Rather than accuse me of not taking it seriously (as a previous pastor had done) she recognized that I was just subverting the question with a subtle blend of intelligent humor and classic wit.




Cathy also provided us with cake plates and pillars. Why? Because we made our own wedding cake.

So, I’ll get to that in a minute.

Next up, let me mention the caterers. Drakes Steak and Ale is a restaurant in Hannibal owned by the Howels, friends of my family in law. Great people, and man do they know how to cook! :D During consultation about the catering, I talked to the owner and head cook about Meat Cakes and making fondant, and he suggested making his special prime rib for the event.


Of course, we offered chicken for those who wanted white meat, but the ratio heavily heavily favored people eating the beef. When asked what else, we went with corn and cheesy scalloped potatoes.

Then came the question of salad.

Sal-lad? What’s a sal-lad?

I told them absolutely no salad. For all the times when I have been places and everyone else enjoys their free salad as an entree and the waitress tells me they can’t exchange it for something like a potato or bread sticks, at last, they shall suffer as I have!

And I told them that.

And they laughed.

And agreed. :)

Apparently out of all the catering stuff, salad gets wasted the most.

So I told them that any money they would’ve spent on salad, to add more prime rib.

They did. :)

My best man said it was the best wedding food he’d ever had.

The slabs of delicious, so tender you could cut it with a butter knife, fatty ended beef were bigger than my face.

One of my groomsmen said, “For seconds, I looked for a smaller piece but there weren’t any!”

Needless to say, screw the booze, I had lots of beef and even some chicken. And yes, delicious potatoes and a couple of rolls. I don’t remember if I had any corn, though.

Hopefully I’m not rambling too much here. I’m just trying to relate some cool things about a whole day and night that was a jumble of awesome and kickass.

Thanks to Luke for the Amaretto Sour. It was tasty and boozy too.

And speaking of presents, I got my groomsmen thank you presents. Four of them got neatly wrapped (thanks to Melody) softcover versions of The Politically Incorrect Guide To Hunting.  Awesome book, but I figured Doug would already have a copy.

Do you remember Doug? :)

Well, for him, I got this…



The back side of it is mostly crumpled up from where I shoved the paper around it and it’s coated with packing tape.

Inside was another note that said something like, “Skeleton + Samurai + Robot + Tank = The most METAL transformer evar.”

I think you can guess who it was. ;)

As an added bonus, I even modded Bludgeon with the very same methods I’m going to have coming up here on

Doug has since told me that Bludgeon shall have a place on his mantle bsx’ing Prince Adam.

Aside from the generous gifts of money, so far the best gift award goes to Luke. He not only bought me a Universe Overkill (because mine has mold issues that I didn’t quite fix completely [though since obtaining this one, I have now, and yes, there will be a guide for it]), he also got Melody a DCUC Question, and what has officially made it the best wedding gift so far…

Variant Wraith.

I don’t know much about the character but he’s a white guy in a tech suit with a mustache. Tony Stark it is.

Or no, actually, he’ll be my G. B. Blackrock.

And he’s clear! I’ve never had a clear plastic Joe before, let alone one in awesome blue.  And he’s got a painted face under the flip up mask!

The clear blue plastic really picks up light easily, but the effect is so much better because of the human face.

Thanks again, Luke! :D

Lets see… What else to mention? Oh!

People were being seated at the church to orchestral music from FF8, people were dismissed to music from The Legend of Zelda, our unity candle music was Love Grows from FF8, when we were announced at the reception we came out to the victory music from FF8, Melody walked down the isle to O by Cirque Du Soleil, and the recessional music?

Well, last year when I was in my friend Jaime’s wedding we all walked out to The Great Adventure. You know, the Indian Jones theme?

I said the only way I could top that was when I got married we’d have to walk out to The Imperial March.

And we did! :D

The crowd didn’t notice at first, because of the applause, but once they did everybody enjoyed it.


At the reception, the DJ wasn’t able to get to all of my special requests, but he did eventually play The Ultimate Showdown of Ultimate Destiny by Lemon Demon, even if it was after most people had gone home for the night.

Honestly, Melody and I aren’t big on dancing so the reception was mostly a party for everyone else to enjoy. So while I did very much enjoy our first dance (Beautiful Freak by the Eels), I did not partake in any electric slide, funky chicken, or other embarrassing dance songs.

But there was one song that I just had to get some people to slow dance to. I managed to get our friends Jaime and Tessa to agree to come slow dance next to me and Melody to Still Alive.

Most of the people wandered off from the dance floor, leaving us two couples to dance. Meanwhile, I looked over to see Doug had wandered out and was slow dancing with a piece of cake.

Oh yes.

And the cake? It was delicious and moist, because Melody and I made it.

Yes, we made our own wedding cake. A few weeks before the wedding we learned how to do it. Thank you internet!

I think we did a pretty good job, too. Most fondant like you see on shows like Ace of Cakes or stuff you’d buy in a store… it tastes like crap. Sweeter playdough.

I didn’t want that, but I wanted the convenience of having something look silky smooth but easier than trying to do that with icing.

I really like I actually used a melding of a couple of different recipes, but the video on that link is by far the most entertaining of them.

We went with white cake, torted (each cake is actually two slabs of cake with a layer of icing in the middle) , cream cheese icing, and marshmallow fondant.

There were three layers, with the plates and icicle pillars borrowed from great aunt Cathy, and the bottom two layers of cake each had a shot glass put in them to house a water activated l.e.d. rose, making the cake glow blue.







And yes, that is Hellboy and Liz for our cake topper.  (I got the box set from Mezco.)


Some friends of ours sat at a table close to the cake and their main entertainment for the first part of the reception was watching people come up in awe of how beautiful the cake looked and watching their expressions as they noticed the topper.

Sure, Liz and HB aren’t a couple in the comics, and I don’t know what’ll happen in the third movie,  but at least for our wedding fan canon they live happily ever after. :)

Also, I’m pretending Norman was hidden somewhere in the cake.

Yes. Pretending.

Anyway, that’s a few details for those of you who were interested. At least now I’ll probably be getting hits off google for people searching for “Hellboy Wedding Cake.”

Also, this is my wedding ring. It is awesome.

This is Melody’s.

Now all we need is somebody with a Thing ring and we can summon Captain Planet.

~Matt Booker

16 thoughts on “Marriage Post

  1. I saw the cake and I was all “IT’S NOT THAT GREAT.” Then I saw it light up.

    You, sir, have won at getting married. My many congragulations to you and your no-longer-future-because-she-is-your-present Mrs. ^>^

  2. Haha. I can’t argue there. It was just a pretty wedding cake if not for glowing flowers. The fondant and icicle pillars really carried the light, and made it much better.

    Not too shabby for our first time assembling the whole thing. ;)

    Also, we had more of those flowers in little bowls of water all through the reception hall (about 50 total), giving it a nice effect cause the lights were dim most of the night.

    Thanks Esoteric. :D

    ~Matt Booker

  3. I don’t know what else to say but Congratulations!
    Sounds like you had a lot of fun and enjoyed a rather unique wedding. So congrats, wish you and your lady a long happy future together

  4. man, i’m happy for ya. you found someone so great who you have a lot in common with. i wish i could find someone like that.

    anyway, congratulations and best wishes.

  5. “We didn’t pick the date because of Valentines day, though we’ll probably get that comment for the rest of our lives, but picked the day because of two things.”
    I maintain that one of those things was a desire to see me squirm uncomfortably all day as I missed the breaking Toy Fair coverage.

    Dammit Matt, I could have been sitting in front of my computer obsessively clicking “refresh” on no less than three dozen sites, but NO, I can’t have nice things!

    But I do have to admit that the kickass cake made up for at least part of it.

  6. Too awesome.


    I think I’ll have to go kill myself, no one can top this. =P

    I never noticed that about Bludgeon, ahaha. Oh hey, do you mind if I spread that Skids picture around the internet? XD

  7. Congraturation! A husband is you!

    No seriously, congrats on getting married, and doing so in what may be the geekiest, most kickass manner I’ve ever heard of. I ever find that special someone for myself, I’m having her read this. :D

    And making your own cake? That would have to be the icing on the… oh you get the idea.

  8. “Oh hey, do you mind if I spread that Skids picture around the internet? XD”

    I don’t think he’d have an issue. I’ve been using it (with his blessing) as my avatar at The Allspark for about six months now.

    “I ever find that special someone for myself, I’m having her read this. :D”
    May I also suggest you take a gander at the wedding of David Willis, who not only pirate-themed it, but capitalized on an internet meme.

  9. Thanks everyone! Bitter Cold, feel free to use that picture where you want, but if you wouldn’t mind just let people know where it came from. :D

    And as for The Touch, Melody and I both don’t really like that song. Rickrolling, maybe if more people in the audience would’ve got the joke. I didn’t want to put up with years of “Why did you play that one song during the wedding?” I’ll be getting enough of that from the topper and the date!

    Willis totally had a more geeked out wedding, though. We went for “tradition with geek accents.” Most people thought it was just going to be a regular ceremony until we played the Imperial March when we walked down the isle.

    Seriously though. It means a lot to me to have awesome people not only regularly comment on stuff here, but to offer congratulations for this. Thanks!

    ~Matt Booker

  10. Yeah, I can see going without “The Touch”. “Instruments of Destruction”, on the other hand… ;)

    Although the DJs did play the song “I Write Sins Not Tragedies” at the reception, which got a lot of “how could they POSSIBLY think this is appropriate?!” comments from the few people who know it/were paying attention.

  11. Yeah, that was a poor choice of a song, though it might’ve been requested by one of the guests.

    And as far as music choices go, I wanted to ban all hiphop and rap, but my wife and I aren’t exactly party people, and since other people like to dance to that we just took those opportunities to go out and check the weather.

    ~Matt Booker

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